Favorite Character Contest

I'm participating in a blogfest in which I get to highlight one of my favorite characters I've ever written.

If that isn't a hard enough decision... I'm not at all good at picking favorites. My kids always ask me what's my favorite movie/song/food/color/... I can never choose!

Anyway, I've decided for this fest to go with Scarlett: a blind girl who has been kidnapped from London. What's been fun about writing Scarlett is that she speaks with a lot of British colloquialisms. She's a small girl with a big personality.

Here are a few of her lines:

"All parents are berks."

"We're here to gen up, savvy?"

"Pull yer finger out."

And the always classic, "Right you are, Guv'nah."

She makes a fun contrast to the stoic American kid who's trying to help her.

Thanks for stopping by and if you follow me, I will always return the favor!

*Click on the button above for full details and to sign up. You could win a critique from Melanie Billings, Acquisitions Editor at Whiskey Creek Press and other cool prizes.

VP: Vampire Preparedness

As promised, a post on Vampires.

Everyone knows not all vampires are bad. They all need blood to survive, so keep that inconvenience in mind before settling down with one.

Vampires are hot. However, it's important to remember not to confuse good looking with good. If you do come across an evil one, you must be prepared.

The number one rule of course: never invite them inside. Once invited across your threshold, they can enter anytime they wish. Garlic around any vulnerable entry points is a good idea.

Vampires are repelled by vervain. I drink vervain tea and always carry vervain lotion.

You are usually safe from vampire attacks in bright sunlight, as they seem to avoid it. However, using sunlight as a main form of defense can lead to skin cancer, so I don't recommend it.

If things get desperate, use a stake. I have a vampire stake, carved by my son and given to me as a mother's day gift. It says "Vampire's Bane" in Saxon. It's really cool.

Remember, all vampire stakes should be made of wood. Some people may tell you to use a silver stake, but they are probably a vampire in disguise. It must be wood because wood is alive, and only living material can kill the dead (or the undead, which is a confusing term because they are dead, just back alive--similar to a zombie, but better looking and better smelling.)

For more information on vampires and how to protect yourself, I recommend you read Bram Stoker's Dracula. It's the best and will teach you how they move in fog and can't cross rushing water except when the tide is out or something. And yes, I openly admit that I've been thoroughly entertained by Twilight, Moonlight the TV series, and a few episodes of Vampire Diaries.

Here is my awesome, crazy son who made the vampire stake, owns an anti-zombie gas mask, and is wearing--yes it's true--an authentic Russian ushenka hat.

How To Survive an Alien Invasion

I have at last come up with a viable and effective way to save mankind from a hostile alien invasion.

All we have to do is cover everything in that impossible-to-open plastic packaging. I believe the correct term is Rigid Plastic Clamshell Packaging.

No one can open it. The aliens will abandon the planet in frustration. They will try scissors, chainsaws, futuristic laser technology, and even mind control. But, alas, that form of packaging is unpenetrable.

Each year, millions of people suffer from the effects of wrap rage. We, the consumers, are fooling ourselves to think that because we buy a product we should be able to access said product.

Frustration isn't the only consideration, it can be dangerous as well. According to BBC, over 67,000 people injure themselves every year in the struggle against clamshell packaging.

And now to add insult to injury:

"Hard to open packaging isn't just a dangerous nuisance, it discriminates against the weak," said Valery McConnell, editor of Yours Magazine.

In a world of equal rights and political correctness, should we be made to suffer such discrimination?

Below is a link to a top secret site with valuable information. After years of research and siphoning government money, WikiHow has developed a few methods to aid in the removal of plastic packaging. However, the aliens MUST NOT SEE THIS. (Click Here)

So there you have it. The next time you curse and cut yourself attempting the impossible--opening a plastic package, you can take some small comfort knowing that in the end, it will save the world.

Follow this link to read how I singlehandedly save the world from Zombies!

2012 - The Year in Preview

I know at this time of year, it's fashionable to look back fondly on all the of the magical moments of the past year.

But, I've never been big on nostalgia.

I prefer to look forward. So instead of a summary, I'm going to list my expectations for the coming year.

- I expect to be able to share some exciting news about one of the books I've written.

- I expect my oldest child to graduate from High School. (Yes, I'm that old!) And he'd better do it with honors after his crazy sleep deprivation project. And in conjunction with this, I expect some filling out of mission papers by the end of the year.

- I expect to take an amazing trip to England with the whole family. I figure this could be my last chance to show my kids all the places I know and love before they spread their wings and fly. 

Lindisfarne (source)

- I expect to lose 10 pounds before said trip. I know this doesn't sound like much, but I'm trying to be realistic.

- I expect the marriage of at least one of my nieces or nephews. So ya'll better get busy! And it better not be in June because I'm NOT canceling another trip for a wedding! Contact me privately if you're single and want a date with an awesome person!

- I expect the world NOT to end on December 21, 2012. Even if that was the plan, I think God wouldn't go through with it, just to show us who's in charge.

Mayan Calendar (source)

2012, here I come!

Experiment in Sleep Deprivation or How To Ruin Christmas For the Whole Family

Final Update: He's sick.


Update December 21, 10:00 am:

He did it! This morning marked the end of his experiment and he is now sound asleep. We have yet to determine what is left of his brain after 72 hours of no sleep and video game overload. So far, the rest of the family is intact, and as far as sickness...we'll need a few days to see how that goes.

He hasn't been home during most of the event, just last night. (Hence the dim glow from the family room all night.) These next few days will tell all in terms of the aftermath.

Special thanks to Heather Bready for providing the giant, green-tinted TV for the video game all-nighters. Stuart said, "Please can we keep it?"

Quote of the Day: "I'm not going to get sick!" ~my son


My son, who is a senior in high school, has worked out some weird extra credit arrangement with his AP Psychology teacher. He gets 25 extra points if he does a sleep deprivation experiment for 72 hours and records how it affects him. I find serious flaws in this plan.

Today marks 24 hours of no sleep for him.

When I called him this morning to see how things went last night, he told me he and his friends were waiting outside for Deseret Industries Thrift Store to open so they could buy more TVs for their stay-awake-all-night-gaming strategy. (Let me also say that he seems a little put-out that we won't just let him take the new 56" flat-screen TV over to his friend's house. Go figure.)

I don't think this brilliant psychology teacher took into account how the sleep deprivation of the teenager would affect the rest of the family.

I predict that in the very near future the following events will occur:

• the sleep deprived child will get into a heap of trouble for attitude problems.
• anger management will drop to an all time low.
• he will be sick for Christmas.
• one or more of his siblings will be massacred in a fit of uncontrollable emotional overload.
• we will have a record number of door slammings, possibly requiring some repair work to the moldings.
• by the end, we will be the first to witness a real live zombie.

Only 48 more hours to go. Stay tuned for the updates!

Self Publishing...Or Not...Again

Quote of the Day: "Do you know what would be sad? If there was a zombie apocalypse and we got infected and ate our pets." ~Overheard 13-year-old say to 10-year-old while doing dishes.

There's been some sparks flying--again--on the whole To Self Publish or Not debate. So, I'm chiming in with my two cents.

Here is a great quote by Edan Lepucki (The Millions) from an interesting article about her reasons for not self publishing. I agree with with much of what she has to say, but not all.

I found this especially in line with my own thoughts:

Readers themselves rarely complain that there isn’t enough of a selection on Amazon or in their local superstore; they’re more likely to ask for help in narrowing down their choices. So for anyone who has, however briefly, played that reviled gatekeeper role, a darker question arises: What happens once the self-publishing revolution really gets going, when all of those previously rejected manuscripts hit the marketplace, en masse, in print and e-book form, swelling the ranks of 99-cent Kindle and iBook offerings by the millions? Is the public prepared to meet the slush pile?

Is the public ready to meet the slush pile? I'm not. And as more kids are getting e-readers, parents have to be doubly vigilant to ensure their kids aren't downloading anything worse than just a poorly written book.

But, as she points out, blogs and other forms of reviews are already popping up to help readers wade through the slush.

My personal reasons for going with a traditional publisher are similar to Ms. Lepucki. Mainly, I want my manuscript to be its best. I want an editor telling me what's working and what's not. I want that stack of revisions to make the story better.

I recently started reading a self-published book with at least FIVE editing errors on THE FIRST PAGE! I don't want that to be me. I had to put the book down.

I have nothing against self-publishing whatsoever. It's just not for me--at least right now.

What are your thoughts?

Can You Guess My Main Character's Age?

**Update: Thanks everyone for your feedback, but I decided not to enter the final contest. 


Here's some info on another great contest by Brenda Drake:

Here's how it's going down ...

Post the first 250 words of your finished, or not quite finished, manuscript (any genre) to your blogs. This contest is about voice--whether or not your character's voice matches his or her's age. So if you mention the age or school grade in the first 250 words, please edit it out or block it out for this contest. Don't list the genre or title on your posts. If your 250 words falls in the middle of a sentence, continue to the end of the sentence.

For official rules and to enter, see her blog, here.

And here is my entry:

Bronwyn placed the tip of her crutch carefully on the jagged rocks. She planted her feet and steadied herself before gazing across the chasm that separated her from the rest of the village. If her mother saw her perched this close to the ravine, she would scold. Her father, had he lived, would be perched beside her. 

Tomorrow she turned (xxxx.) For most girls, that meant old enough to marry. For her, well, who would want a crippled wife?

A gust of wind whipped her dress and pushed her toward the edge. Bronwyn leaned onto her crutch, relying on the sturdy wooden limb to restore her balance. 

“Come away, Child!” called her mother, her hands cupped round her mouth. “You’ll fall to your death. There’s a storm moving in and the geese are out.”

“I’m coming,” she said, though her mother could not have heard over the moaning of the wind. 

Bronwyn stepped back, casting one last glance toward the village. The first day of summer approached, and the festival of Calan Mai. She rolled her eyes. Wonderful. Another year of watching while other girls danced around the maypole. No dancing for her. Not now or ever. 

Thanks for stopping by, and if you comment or follow me, rest assured I will return the favor!